“ I’m sorry to say sweetie but long distance relationships r very hard n a lot can happen in that time of u going back. what's the rush on having a bf? I know that its great having someone there all the time to hug n kiss and to tell ur day to but for some reason ur heart tells u otherwise. I think that u shud enjoy ur single life as much as u can! I regret living with someone from the age off 21 to 26. So my advice is just to date boys doesn't mean sleep around but have fun go out live life travel because u only have 1 life in this world make the best of it without having some drag u down or were u have to think oh I have to make sure its ok with bf if I do this...its about not having worries and just being urself and doing all the things u wanted to do. Not be one of these girls that get preggo n married n then say to themselves I wish I would have done things different and somewhat regret their life. Things do happen for a reason but I also think we control our future by the actions we do now, I guess what I'm trying to say is live ur life to the fullest and don't let anything or n e one hold u back from doing the things u wanna do! and when u r ready to settle down u can honestly say, I've done everything I wanted to do now its time to start a new life with someone! ”

…extracted from a friend’s note in FB

:))

This clip is so touching~~~~  T________T

“Life Is Too Short To Be Thinking There Is Only Me and You” – lifeisacircle

“Life is too short to spend your precious time trying to convince a person who wants to live in gloom and doom otherwise. Give lifting that person your best shot. but don’t hang around long enough for his or her bad attitude to pull you down. Instead, surround yourself with optimistic people” – Zig Zigler

“Forgive. Forget. Bear with the faults of others as you would have them bear with yours. Be patient and understanding. Life is too short to be vengeful or malicious.” – Philip Brooks

Emotional Baggage

…. Until you control inner reactions, it’s harder to control situations. Your control gets diminished if frustration, anger, impatience, and insecurity affect your response and outlook. …

Taking Charge of Emotions

Emotional situations can bring out the little girl in us…. Your responses today may reflect yesterday’s pain. Frustration triggers emotions that can make you feel out of control…

“ When my emotions ruled me, I hated myself. When I met Jilli, I envied her unruffled manner. One day everything went wrong, yet Jilli calmly juggled. I asked how. She said she likes feeling in control and intentionally manages her emotions. And she boxes to relieve stress. I’ve joined her and punch out frustrations. That helps control my emotions. The more I control, the more empowered I feel!” – Courtney

People Pleasers think anger isn’t nice. Smiling and suppressing behind an acquiescent facade seems more agreeable.

“I’d push anger away or scream, which felt good momentarily but left me ashamed after. The person didn’t understand why I was angry and got annoyed. I experimented. Nicely explaining myself feels in control, and the person listens objectively. Knowing I’ve made my point helps me let it go. I feel free now. I control the anger instead of its controlling me.” – Jessie

Set yourself free! Articulate anger in a nice but resolute way. Like steam, anger needs outlets.

* Wait until you’re calmer, not rushed.
* Address it fast and send it bye-bye.
* Be specific, sans melodrama, “ I feel like you don’t trust me when you…..” instead of “you hurt when you…”
* Avoid attack mode. It’s harder to listen objectively if you yell. Use a soft, level and friendly tone.
* Don’t use nasty words.
* Focus on actions/situations, not the person.
* Don’t be apologetic.

Anger hurts you, not the one you’re angry with. The habit of staying angry can be break if you choose to. Take a deep breath and think happy thoughts.

“ Holding on to anger makes me bitter and angry. It takes more energy to be those than the energy it would take to make fifteen people smile. I thought about the good and the bad wolf that is inside everyone – feed the good wolf and starve the bad wolf. Then I realized, love the bad wolf and eventually he will be a good wolf as well. That’s where I’m at today.” – Heidi

Forgiving frees you from being a prisoner of resentment. Revenge doesn’t. Use the energy behind anger for good.

* Burn your feelings, as described earlier. Have a good cry if necessary.
* Think about your blessings. Consider how powerful you’re becoming – it’s your choice to forgive and let go.
* Affirm “ I forgive XXX. It’s over. I love myself and don’t want to be angry.”

Forgive in your heart from afar. If someone does something unforgivable, forgive inside and move on.

Compassion enables forgiving. I live by the Dalai Lama’s belief that people who hurt you are suffering. Happy people avoid unkindness. Replace anger with empathy for someone’s pain. I’ve addressed mean behaviour with “ You must be hurt if you did that. I have compassion for you.” It feels better than rage. Identify why someone may be hurting. Don’t excuse it, but have compassion. Feel sorry for those who suffer enough to hurt others and be grateful for your blessings and the person you are.

************************************************************************************************************************

Random song..

Private emotion – Ricky Martin & Coco Lee

Continuation of Jen’s story..

“I never want to be untrue to myself again. It’s like feeling uncomfortable in your own skin. No one has a right to make me feel that way. IT is that nightmare of feeling “not me” that motivates making myself and what I want a bigger priority. It is healthy to voice my opinion, and it should not only matter but also be respected. I’ve grown into a stronger woman because I know now I can rely on myself to make my goals a reality. I don’t need to be with someone – there are other fish in the sea! Knowing I am finally in control of my life is something I’ve worked very hard to achieve since leaving my ex. I’m proud of my accomplishments, and the men I date now find my interest and goals fascinating! There is no shame in learning from mistakes.” – Jen

“I treat everyone with respect and consideration, enjoy helping when possible, and do my best to respect my own needs. I’m soft-spoken but express feelings and desires. Holding things in creates unhealthy anger.I’m entitled to be important!”

“Don’t do nice things for bargaining chips or succumb to guilt about not doing someone’s bidding”

“And oftentimes excusing of a fault, Doth make the fault worse by the excuse” - Shakespeare

…. adapted from Nice Girls Can Finish First.

Highly recommended MUST WATCH!!
Even after the first song, I felt like giving MJ a big applause… but then only to realize i am in a cinema..  @.@’’
with all the passive spectators, except for a lil girl who actually clapped :p
Do not mind watching for few more times till the 11th of Nov :PpP

Anyway, the part that i love most is the Earth Song clip..
love MJ’s quote “The Earth is sick. It’s like a fever or something. No one can save the earth except US. US”
and the little girl is so cute~~~

This clip reminds me of my bro…

There’s this section at 3:40 when MJ is holding on to 2 tree barks…
Last time, when we were a little bit younger like… when i was in primary school, my bro was 5-6 years old back then. Both of us would take two BIG bolsters and imitate MJ’s act in holding on the 2 tree barks and goes “Ah ha ah ha ah Ha ah ho o..…”

A very nostalgic moment with my bro.. My bro was so cute back then.. Now, he has turned to some macho guy..
”All the best in your exam!! :)”

“ I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody” – Bill Cosby

“ The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs” – Joan Didion

“ If you are not ready today, you will be even less so tomorrow” – Ovid
[ the readiness to change]

“ If I thought someone didn’t like me I’d do more favors. My cousin asked why I never worried about me, pointing out I’m always stressed about others. It was true. While I hoped for security, I was very insecure about never being good enough. She lectured that people like favors, not me, and I deserve much better. I listened. And pondered her words – a lot. Slowly I curtailed favors. It’s painful to know someone doesn’t like me, but now I accept it instead of trying to buy them” – Verna

“ It was scary – knowing I was with the wrong person, yet financially powerless to leave. I did anything to avoid conflicts and wouldn’t stand up for what I wanted. I was complacent and in some ways living in fear, afraid of where my life was going and how long I would live with him. Would he break up with me? I thought all my dreams and knew my boyfriend didn’t take them seriously. He wasn’t supportive, had no confidence in me, and thought I would never accomplish what was important to me. Eventually I believed maybe I couldn’t do them, they weren’t as important as I thought, or they were stupid and childish. I tried to forget them, but they wouldn’t go away. Every time we fought, I escaped to place where I was happy with myself and working hard to achieve dreams that didn’t seem out of reach. After an all-night argument that wasn’t resolved, I woke up and finally admitted I was living a lie. I was unhappy. Life was too short to be miserable. I did not like the person I was living with and was angry he did not care about what was important to me and even angrier with myself. I did not like the person I had let myself become. I vowed never to let pride, stubbornness, and fear control me again.” – Jen

“ Almost two years ago, I discovered I’d been a scapegoat for almost every person involved in my life. I still give a lot but now know to feed myself first, over everything. I try to remember how I got here” - Heidi

“ I’m setting limits and sticking to them. I feel more in control and happy to still be nice. I’ve finally accepted that people don’t have to be nice to me and I don’t have to give to someone who doesn’t deserve it. I’m more at peace. It feels much better than being a bitch, and I’m getting a lot more in nice ways” - Susan

…… adapted from Nice Girls Can Finish First by Daylle Deanna Schwartz

@.@

it’s confusing….

Uncle collecting kupang when ‘air surut’ nearby Qb Mall.

bersantai-santai & had dinner nearby...

being a little bit adventurous, I went to the neighbourhood area to find a new place to rent. And guess where I ended up at…

It’s like some hilly road, winding and steep. Surrounded by trees.. Lots of them… It’s on the way to Balik Pulau..
The worst things is, I do not have a detailed map with me. And I don’t know how long does it take to reach BP.
which is a bit risky & scary to be alone that time. And I don’t have confidence with Nemo going uphill.. (nowadays, I have to take care of Nemo if anything happened to him. Dad’s not going to bring the car to service for me this time round. No one will check for me if my tyre is still in good shape – like i know how to see it myself @.@”” )  it’s like a battle within myself most of the time. I’m not so much of a risk taker now.. Sometimes I hold back my decision more often than before…  How I wish I am a guy…. (at least the chances of getting sexually asaulted/harrassed is near to 0%)

Anyway, i didn’t stay too long up there. Lucky for me there is an old couple who looked familiar stopped by. Quickly I took those pictures and left.  U-turn and went back home :p Later in the evening, I told my friends about it and they told me, the stop that I went is the place where all the “car modifiers” show off their speakers and etc etc. That’s also the place those people hang out..

scarweeee……  :S

next time, need to be fully equipped if i were to go up there again.. @.@””

till the next weekend-

new adventures coming up :))

-rainbow from HammerBay-

Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray

Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I'd pray
I could break away

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky.
Make a wish, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget all the ones that I love.
I'll take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jetplane
Far away
And break away

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky.
Make a wish, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget all the ones that I love.
I'll take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away

Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging with revolving doors
Maybe I don’t know where they’ll take me
Gotta keep movin on movin on
Fly away
Break away

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
Though it’s not easy to tell you goodbye
Take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away
Breakaway
Break away

*************************************************************************************************************************

I’m taking a chance, making a change.
A change to a better, efficient & more productive lifestyle.
A change to achieve my dreams.

*************************************************************************************************************************

This evening, the facilitator was talking about Rudyard Kipling’s “IF”…

And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings -- nor lose the common touch

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run --

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And -- which is more -- you'll be a Man, my son!

Still holding strongly on my own principles & dreams. All i need now is my own effort, consistency & initiative to make things work out~~ :)) Make yours come true too!!  :)

My first time witnessing horse racing & horse race betting!

Look at the crowds. This is… i think the second floor of the open area seats. Entrance for this seats category is RM6. While the one with air-conditioner is rm20. Everyone were screaming and cheering for the horses they bet. (one of the corner stairs leading up to this place was stinky - the ammonia smell..urggh…. :S)

******************************************************************************************************************

My first time witnessing bicycle marathon too.. it’s sad that i couldnt make it for the Mizuno Run today  :((

On your mark, get set, GO!!!

:))

********************************************************************************************************************

random shots from a 2MP mobile:

While taking the train to work two months ago, around taman bahagia/ tmn jaya..

blue skies & greeneries~~ :))

lovely weather :D

Pic A: KLCC
Pic B: Cute purple dress (iwant) :P
Pic C: The famous yam rice @ Tmn ChiLeung, Klang :))

Signing off~

:)

“ Confidence is very important being a women”
“ Gotta have confidence. Gotta feel good at what you do. Confidence Confidence Confidence”

Survival Kit tips #1: Be Confident!! :)

continuation from Miri day 2 (A)~!

We visited a friend at Niah town after the great & tiring Niah Cave expedition. We had lunch over his place. He treated us Durians from his family orchard and his mum’s kopi-O smells really good (that was the last time i had coffee before the caffeine attack 2 days ago –.-||). anyway, speaking of durians, i miss durian cheesecake from secret recipe and also the durian mooncake from baker’s cottage. Wonder when can i have them …  :p

After lunch, he invited us to his family orchard…. Having stayed in KL for about 20 years, I was quite excited that i get to go to fruits orchard. I always have the idea of working in an apple orchard back in UK. Waking up early, go trees to trees checking the condition of the fruits, the health of the apple trees, putting fertilizers, etc etc..  but unfortunately, i didnt manage to do that in UK. lol.. anyway, upon reaching the orchard and his house (there’s a small orchard around his house), i’d admit that we acted a lil bit like budak jakun from bandar who have never seen an orchard before.. lolz.. i was totally stunned when i saw a very big sized melon trees crawling at the fence. (i’ve never seen that before.. :p) Apart from melon trees, we saw another species of mango (which i’d forgotten the name), pamelo, pumpkin, longan, rambutans, buah nona, some vegetables, and amazingly, we saw avocado trees in his orchard. Avocado in Malaysia?!?  being a rare fruit in Malaysia, I couldnt believe it at first.. but when i checked it online, it says avocado can grow in tropical climate and it is widely grown in Thailand … So i guess, it is possible then…^^

He’s so friendly that he gave us two boxes of fruits – durians, rambutan, pamelo…

Some random fruits found at the market…

Pic 5: Buah Talak
Pic 6:  Buah Salak

After the orchard trip, we went for a visit to the Sarawak Oil Palm Mill.

it’s all about palm oil. palm oil kernels here and there. smells like palm oil too – greasy…

we learnt the whole process on how palm oil is extracted from the whole raw tandan kelapa sawit. and it’s a free tour :P it’s definitely precious & priceless. thanks to HJ :)

(and after that trip, i was quite determined that palm oil is not my type of industry... somehow  :p)

as usual, we went back home with delicious food awaiting us at the dining area…

words arent enough to express our gratitude to HJ’s parents…

we had good food, and stay very comfortably throughout the trip >.<

the change in society make trusting issue such a hassle…
:S

came across to a video posted by a friend of mine, the “just-married” bride…
the groom was singing this song 一生中最愛 at stage while the bride walked down the aisle towards the stage..
both of them were so sweet..
many many blessings ahead :)

Here is a version by Alan Tam & Hacken Lee during their 左麟右李 concert.
awesome duo. they rocked the stage!
love the part especially at 2:53 and 3:07

如真 如假 如何分身飾演自己,
會將心中的溫柔 獻出給你唯有的知己,
如痴 如醉 還盼你懂珍惜自己,
有天即使分離 我都想你, 我真的想你

如果痴痴的等, 某日終於可等到一生中最愛

edited:
a junior schoolmate passed away due to heart failure…
may her soul rest in peace..<3
god bless her family..

during his younger day….

looking even better as he grew older…..

the first song kept playing in my laptop today.. lol
dun even try to board on an airplane to search for me in the future.
as far as i understand, it’ll be another empty promises, empty words..
those words are the words that i never comprehend ever since the day you told me..
just like how the song sings..
為什麼道別離 又說什麼在一起
如今雖然沒有你 我還是我自己
說什麼此情永不渝 說什麼我愛你
如今依然沒有你 我還是我自己
i’m better off by myself now..
there are ups and downs for sure but i know i’m stronger day by day as i go thru the obstacles
it’s about a year plus by now.. still, i felt the guilt sometimes.lol..
would like to apologize to any parties that got hurt before.
i know i have no right to say but yea…
hope both of you appreciate each other more & more each day.
hope to listen some good news about you guys someday. lolz
thanks for the lesson learnt, a very expansive lesson i am sure..

finally, it’s the cut off that i longed like forever…
a trip away to rebuild a stronger self-esteem,
a trip that would exchange for better days ahead, 
very excited but at the same time a little bit nervous too.. 

thanks to all who walked in my life..
you never know that i’m learning the very best part of you everyday.
some with high confidence, some with positive determination,
some with good speaking & negotiation skills, those who speaks mandarin/ cantonese/local dialects/,
and also, to those hot-tempered people, i actually learned how to be more patient from you
all of you, with your intelligence & positive attitude, you’ve made a better me :) 
and the learning process will still continue until the very last day i’m alive.. haha.. :p

-off to bed-

nights

p/s: one of my friend was suggesting me to have an english name. and he suggested “Charmaine”… what do you think?? haha  XD

Virgo..
Ambition can be a double-edged sword, Virgo. Sometimes it can alienate you from the very people that you hoped would share in your success. This week invites you to involve others in the decision-making. The present is tomorrow’s happy memories, so make the best of each precious day.


-extracted from The Star, 4th October 2009

Rest in peace, poor little bird…
I am so sorry…. 
If only…
we never cross path each other, you could have been still alive….
@.@

:'(

today’s shopping is depressing…
and my virgoan senses is ticking me off….
not only did i not get the things i wanted, i end up buying more stuff that’s not in my priority list….
@.@

so chickadee !#$%^& lol